A light in the darkness

Mondays are always hard. Mondays during a pandemic, in the middle of winter, are a different beast altogether.

Today is a remote learning day for my girls. Here we sit at the dining room table. Both girls are on their school chrome books and I am on my laptop, while the snow falls quietly outside. While I’m so grateful to have them home today, it doesn’t quite cure my Monday blues.  There is at least a haze of sunlight from time to time, and for that I’m extremely grateful. I don’t mind the cold so much. The snow doesn’t bother me, but the darkness; it’s just too much. I need light. A glimmer. A spark of shimmering hope.

 This pandemic, this era in our lives, seems to be never ending and all encompassing. As someone who is obsessive compulsive and an avid planner, it is absolutely maddening. I want to plan outings, trips, concerts, but everything seems like such a question mark. I suppose we plan for the best and prepare for the worst? The new mantra to survive a new age.

I have an inkling to apologize for the depressive nature of this post, but I absolutely wont. While it’s so important to be spreading positivity to each other right now, I think it’s equally important to be honest that things are still stressful. It’s okay to be overwhelmed by the state of the world right now, and I would actually find it unnerving if I spoke to someone who wasn’t the least bit concerned. If you have a day where you falter,  fall, or are sinking in the dark, it’s okay. Just don’t stay there. Don’t take up residence. Keep fighting towards your light, whatever that may be. Your light is unique. It could be your family, your dreams, or your career. The human race is blessed with an incredible resilience. We continue to push forward, we persevere. We laugh, and love, and take hold of the moments and days we are given.

 We have the ability to emerge from this transformed. To be more grateful for the time with family and friends, to fully experience the gift that is live music or a large gathering. To soak every second of every experience in to the fullest. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. We are warriors. Keep fighting toward your light.